You come at the king, you best not miss. -- Omar Little

Crap. I missed posting yesterday. I was tired. I have no real excuse.

Anyway, in honor of my dear sister-in-law who is coming for a visit today (who is in medical school in Baltimore), I will write about the Orioles.


Bawlmer.

I have some pretty strong feelings about Baltimore. We used to live there. We still own a house there. I wish we didn't (we rent it out, but at a loss). Apparently, moving away right as the housing market crashed was not the financially savvy thing to do. Hindsight. Hopefully we'll get to sell it someday soon and come out close to even, because I'm not exactly planning to retire there.

I really don't like it there. The city politics are horribly corrupt, urban blight was practically invented there, and commuting to DC from there was on paper, not bad, but in practice, terrible.

It's like Pittsburgh, but awful.

Part of my negativity about the city likely stems from the fact that we bought a house and renovated it, and finished it right before we moved out, and during that year and a half of renovation that we did mostly ourselves we had a baby and commuted an hour and a half each way to DC for work and all of my friends and family were at least 40 miles away and we had very little money and people kept getting mugged outside...so I was exhausted and worried and broke and we had no help with the baby and few friendly faces. I was miserable there. I get that, realistically, this is not all ENTIRELY the city of Baltimore's fault (and in retrospect, there may have been some post-partum depression at play), but it frankly feels that way, and I can't untie my personal misery from the experience of living there.

The best thing about Baltimore (besides overuse of the word "hon" and beehive hairdos) is The Wire. It's the best television show ever produced, and won exactly ZERO important awards. People are idiots.

See, even writing about Baltimore puts me in a sh*tty mood.

The Wire was on HBO, and tells the story of the city via drug dealers, drug addicts, dock workers, cops, kids, the politicians, and the press.  It is the best show that you have ever, or never, watched. I guarantee this. It's remarkably true-to-life -- seriously, that stuff HAPPENS there -- and it will break your heart. Especially season 4.

The show also has some of my very favorite tv characters: Stringer Bell, Bubs, and Omar Little. Apparently, I'm not the only one who thinks Omar is fantastic. And Jimmy McNulty is a super-hot train wreck of a man. There is one of the most creative scenes I've ever seen on tv that takes place between Jimmy and his partner Bunk, where they walk you step-by-step through an entire murder scene using only gestures and the f-bomb, and you completely understand exactly what transpired. It's been written about extensively, and aptly described by one author as a "goddamn symphony of profanity".

The show will make you laugh, and cry, and think. It gives you hope and crushes it, and not necessarily in that order. If you haven't seen it, watch it from the beginning, you WILL NOT be sorry you did. Stick with it, even if Season Two isn't your favorite (sometimes it's not), it is absolutely worth it.

So, that's my tale of Baltimore.

All in the game, yo, all in the game.

(In the interest of equal time, I will also say that one of Matthew's favorite restaurants is in Baltimore, Golden West Cafe. They have awesome tater tots. It is definitely a redeeming feature of the city. That, and the cheapness and availability of crab. And Poe lived there. Yeah, I think that's about it.)

Blame Canada.

The Toronto Blue Jays are in Canada.

I love Canada. Although I think it would be alright if they only competed with us in hockey, and left baseball alone. Just seems unnatural.


Anyway, Canada is fabulous. It's like Minnesota, but even cleaner, with fewer guns, and more francophones. And poutine. And socialized medicine. And pâté. And liberals. And up until recently, a favorable exchange rate with U.S. dollars.


Let me tell you a little story about Canada. We went to Canada on our honeymoon, 10+ years ago. We got married in December, in between semesters in law school, so we were *broke*. While I wanted to go to the Greek isles, that was simply not possible given our budget. And seeing as we like snow and my husband wanted to ski, we decided to go to Canada. We went to Calgary for a couple of days, which looked exactly like Minneapolis but with a rodeo. The exchange rate was killer, so we stayed in a Fairmont hotel (fancy!!). We had a suite, for the low low price of about $119 USD / night. 


When we arrived, I was really tired so I took a nap. I woke up from said nap with a sore throat and a fever. The next day, my brand-new husband called the front desk and they found us a doctor that was open on a Saturday and sent us on our way. At the clinic, we waited for about 10 minutes and then got to see the doctor. The receptionist asked if I had my Alberta Health card, and I said no, I'm American. They were so apologetic when they told me the visit would cost $35. Canadian. Even a broke law student can afford that!


I got in to see the doctor a few minutes later. He looked at my throat and in my ears and wrote me a prescription for antibiotics for my strep. He then spent the next 10 minutes writing down places for us to visit, eat, and ski  -- he was our own personal Not For Tourists guide.


I got my prescription filled at the Canadian pharmacy for about $5 CAD, and then bought all sorts of fun flavors of Halls that they don't sell in the US (blueberry!) and boxes of allergy medicine that were prescription-only back home (Allegra!). Customs didn't seem to care, thankfully.


I felt better right away, so we drove to Banff and Lake Louise right on schedule and skiied and ate and had a fabulous time, for a very reasonable amount of money. I hope we can go back for our 15th and do the same, although I doubt it will be as cheap.


(Socialism + snow / decent exchange rate ) * really nice people = what's not to love about Canada, eh?

 

 

Brave(s)

 

Now that's out of the way.

Braves. Bravery. I'm trying to be brave, I started doing the Jillian Michaels Body Revolution this week. I had lost all of my baby weight three weeks after she was born -- I had gestational diabetes and I was absolutely religious about diet and exercise, so it was very well controlled without insulin. That meant that I was actually losing weight while I was pregnant -- the baby kept growing, but the rest of me was shrinking. Nice, right? So I lost everything immediately...and then what did I do? Exercise? Eat right? Nope and nope. I ate Halloween candy, Thanksgiving pumpkin pie (and whoopie pies), and Christmas candy and cookies and everything else...so I gained 10 lbs before you could say "King Arthur Flour". 

Matthew is doing it with me. We began with the 7 day kickstart, which is about 1200 calories and two 30 minute exercise periods a day. The first two days were fine. And boy, do I hate to be hungry. HATE IT. But it really wasn't terrible...until lunchtime today. Today, I was EXHAUSTED and sick...to the point where I took a two-hour nap this afternoon and woke up and still could hardly stand up. So I broke out my handy dandy diabetes sugar meter left over from the pregnancy, and lo and behold I had ridiculously low blood sugar. Apparently, all of the exercise and so little food and nursing the baby don't all combine well.

So, we're off the kick-start phase and onto the more varied but still calorie-restricted diet. I'm just really happy to not have to eat tilapia for dinner or tomatoes with everything. I feel kind of like a failure, because  I should have been able to gut this out better. But, I will keep trying to do what I can do and follow the program; if I need another 200 hundred calories of lower-carb food a day to be able to walk around like a human being, so be it. If I can't stand up, I can't exercise, and that seems to be very important for this program (and in general, of course).

I actually threw away the last homemade Twinkie from the ski trip today. Not easy, but I did it. It's gone. Maybe I'll make it through after all.

If you build it...

The Chicago White Sox were at the heart of the 1919 "Black Sox Scandal" and "8 men out" --  when eight players were banned from professional baseball for life as a result of intentionally losing games for $$$.

You know how I know so much about this? Wikipedia? Perhaps a little. But REALLY...what I need to know about the White Sox I learned from "Field of Dreams."

I really like this movie. It's fun and sentimental and takes place in Iowa and there are ghosts and James Earl Jones and a tagline -- "If you build it, they will come."

[I do wonder, though, if Dennis Quaid looks at Kevin Costner and thinks "Dude, you totally stole my career...and I could have done it much better than you." If he did, he would be correct.]

BUT...there's something else that comes to mind when I think of "If you build it.." And that's Pinterest.

If you don't know much about it, Pinterest is a social media pinboard site, where people post ("pin") pictures of things that interest them and organize those pictures into folders, and share that with their friends. Pinterest took off like gangbusters -- in January 2012, it had almost 12 million unique users, and was the fastest site in history to break the 10 million mark. Apparently, they built it, and people came. Quickly and in large numbers.

I don't just blog about Pinterest; I'm also a client. I have a love/hate relationship with Pinterest. I LOVE many things about it:

• I enjoy wasting time
• I enjoy looking at pretty pictures
• I enjoy seeing what my friends are up to and which pretty pictures they waste their time looking at
• I like being able to keep track of things I've seen that I want to get back to later

I HATE the following:

• How much time I can waste on it
• How completely detached from reality most people's pins are (including my own)
• The ridiculousness and pretentiousness that abound

For example, on any given day you will see the following:

• a picture of a mango-quinoa blueberry corn salad posted by someone that you know who subsists on burgers, fries, and chinese food, with the caption "Nom nom! So yummy!" Whatever. You will never make that, let alone eat that. Who do you think you're kidding?
• prints with variations on the "keep calm and _______" theme and exhortations made by 1950's style housewives that the speaker is fluent in "sarcasm and profanity" and other various someecards. Yes, we've all been to the site. They are funny. But do you need to collect 40 of them and refer to them on a regular basis? 
• a picture of a dessert that looks full-fat and fabulous but is called something like "low-fat brownie yogurt balls" with the caption "These are amazing!!! And only 86 calories per serving!!!" Really? Did you make them and eat them? Then don't attest to their fabulousness. Frequently, if you click through these pictures back to the original or semi-original poster (which is the only way to get the actual recipe) you'll see comments like "Huh, you know, when I did the math they were 200 calories per quarter-sized serving, are you sure about that?" Caveat eat-tor.
• Pictures of cupcakes with elaborate toppers and exquisite party decorations that are re-pinned by everyone you know with kids -- "Perfect for Madison's 4th B-day!" Um, sure. Is someone from Land of Nod stopping by to hang all of that crap up for you, or is this for you to show your professional party planner? Or are you really just going to tape up some balloons and streamers and buy the matching Disney Princess plates, cups, and plastic tablecloth from Target? Because THAT'S OKAY too.

My husband asked me "what is the deal with Pinterest? I have no idea what it's about." Here's my answer:

Pinterest is:

• food that one will never cook
• houses one will never own
• crafts one will never do (see previous post re: that damn tooth fairy door)
• quotations one will never say
• clothes that one will never wear
• books that one will never read
• parties that one will never throw
• hairstyles that one could never pull off

Kevin Costner had the Field of Dreams, but apparently Pinterest is the website of dreams.

And that's my baseball post of the day. Time to go pin stuff.

Are you going to San-Fran-cisco....?

The San Francisco Giants. These guys.

They were originally the Gothams, which is a much more interesting name, and apparently have a big rivalry with the Dodgers, also formerly from NY. The Giants used to play in Harlem, near Central Park and then later further north, deeper into Harlem, always renaming their home field "The Polo Grounds".

I did not know that.

San Francisco is the most expensive city in the continental US that I have never lived in or visited for any length of time. I have no interest in living in California, but if I did, it would be in/near San Francisco.

This is interesting though - San Francisco is the most expensive city in the country for renters, according to a recent article in the Daily Mail. New York didn't even make the top 10. That's going to annoy a lot of New Yorkers, because they (formerly we) love to kvetch about how everything is so expensive and tiny and it's such a huge pain to live here but why on earth would anyone live anywhere else because this is the most fabulous city in the world? 

Until you do. And you find another place that suits you. Which sounds like exactly what the Giants did.

Sorry this is so devoid of actual content....Read yesterday's post, it's longer, if you're fixin' for more reading material.

Happy Monday, everyone!

Dodgers...dodging...skiing...

Today I'm going to write about the Dodgers.

Well, kind of.

Actually, not really.

I'm going to relate them to something I would like to talk about -- my weekend. We went skiing in Vermont...with some friends of mine who used to live in L.A. [relation 1] They used to ski in Mammoth, but this weekend they skied in Vermont. With us. [relation 2] The mountain was pretty empty on Friday, but on Saturday it was crazy full, and we had to DODGE people all over the place. [relation 3] It was really sunny and warm this weekend, about 60 degrees, which is pretty much like L.A. [relation 4]

Relevance satisfied. Now for my story.

So we went to Vermont to ski. Brought the baby, left the big girl at home with her grandmother. This was our first time skiing since our honeymoon 10 years ago, and let's just say I'm not in nearly as good a shape as I was then. When we planned this trip, we knew that this had been a pretty warm winter, but typically March is a very snowy month in the Northeast, so we figured that between early February and mid-March, there would be a few wicked snowstorms.

We thought wrong.

There was a decent base, about 3 or 4 feet, but when it doesn't keep snowing and the weather is over 50 degrees, that base does not last long. So we participated in what skiers like to call "Spring Skiing", but I like to call "Suck".

Friday was okay, but my boot was all jacked up and by the time I took it off, I couldn't really touch my shin without yelping. I thought it would be fine by Saturday, but when I put the boot on and walked around the condo we had rented, I was kind of in tears. I sucked it up though and went outside. "Oh yeah, I can totally do this, I'm fine."

"Ski in, ski out" -- that was the whole point of staying there, right? Well, by the time I got over to the "ski out" portion, I could barely get my skis on because there was a crust on the snow that I could not penetrate. Turning was impossible, between the icy ground and the fact that whatever muscle/tendon thing is in the front of my shin had a huge lump on it and screamed with pain every time it touched my boot. I couldn't shift my weight forward; ergo, I could not ski. We paid $70 to ride the chair lift twice and take two icy crappy runs where I pretty much had to snowplow because I couldn't rotate my inside leg.

Lame. Literally and figuratively.

My remarkably considerate husband went to get the car so I didn't have to "ski in" back to the place we were staying...and because of the conditions he had to hike up the hill carrying his skis over the shoulder. He was a sweaty exhausted mess by the time he came to get me, so we just called it.

Now here's the good part - we showered and then went to a cute little Vermont town and bought whoopie pies and craft beers and THAT'S how we spent the rest of the sunny afternoon. And it was so warm we didn't even need our jackets.

That is what I like to call a "silver lining."

Also, through the magic of Facebook, a girl I knew in high school saw the picture I had posted during the weekend and commented, "Hey, is that Sugarbush behind you? Do you know I live two towns away?" So we stopped by her house on our way out of town and had a lovely afternoon visit -- I haven't seen her in 19 years. (MY GOD! That's like a whole PERSON!) Plus, she scored because I brought her all of the beers we hadn't finished. Win/win.

Essentially, I spent the entire weekend skiing a little, eating a lot (the aforementioned whoopie pies, fondue, cupcakes, bacon and eggs), drinking more beer than I've drank in the past year combined, and enjoying my dear friend's and my husband's company. Plus, on the way up we stopped at a place my husband saw on Diners, Drive-ins and Dives and I bought homemade Twinkies. They taste like regular Twinkies but minus the chemical aftertaste.

Turns out you don't even miss it.

See all the beautiful snow? No? Me neither. But that's a damn fine donut.

The Reds, or One More Team Named for Hosiery

If you asked me "Tell me something about the Cincinnati Reds," I would mutter some phrases like "Pete Rose was some sort of gambler, right?" and "Marge Schott was some sort of racist, right?"

But a small part of the Wikipedia entry for this team makes me like them -- at least, the historical "them" -- 

The best players of the Cincinnati Red Stockings relocated to Boston after the 1870 season, taking the nickname along with them and becoming the Boston Red Stockings, a team later dubbed the "Beaneaters" and eventually the "Braves", who are now based in Atlanta. A new Cincinnati Red Stockings team became a charter member of the National League in 1876, five years after the first Red Stockings team. The second Red Stockings team was expelled from the league after the 1880 season, in part for violating league rules by serving beer to fans at games, and for their refusal to stop renting out their ballpark, the Bank Street Grounds, on Sundays. 

Sweet. So their fans were drinkers and they were capitalists who ignored blue laws.

That's a team I can get behind.  Hosiery and all.

"Los Angeles is a constellation of plastic." - Norman Mailer

Hello all, today's blog post is brought to you by your fascinating guest blogger, Bethany's husband Matthew.

                                            

Today, I'll be writing about The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.  Seriously, that name is ridiculous.  Does that mean we should call them the Minnesota Twins of Minneapolis, or the Texas Rangers of the Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex (but mostly in Arlington)?  Is there something special about Anaheim that makes it worth mentioning, other than Disneyland?  I know Disney wants us to believe that Anaheim is some kind of destination worth caring about, but no one really does.  Disney World is infinitely better, if you like that kind of thing.

There's not much to say about the Angels other than that they won one World Series in 2002 against an incredibly juiced Barry Bonds.  However, the original owner of the Angels was none other than Gene Autry, cowboy singer extraordinaire.  Gene Autry's real name is Orvon Grover Autry, so you can see why he went by Gene (although Gene isn't really a badass cowboy name either, I'd bet that if he was a real cowboy he wouldn't have done very well).

                         

Orvon Grover is most famous for the songs "Here Comes Santa Claus", "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer", and "Frosty the Snowman" (also not particularly cowboy).  He owned a ranch in California that was originally called the Monogram Ranch.  He renamed it Melody Ranch, not very cowboy.  Although they did film the first few years of Gunsmoke there, so that maybe gives it an air of authenticity. So, I guess what I'm saying is that Orvon Grover, the Angels, and Los Angeles are perfect partners.  He was a fake cowboy, the Angels don't really have an identity (they just sign good players from other teams, a small time Yankees if you will), and I'm pretty sure Los Angeles doesn't really exist.

Ladies and Gentleman, your Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim!

***Blog owner's note -- The views of this author do not necessarily reflect those of the blog owner. She (I) would like to say for the record that she (I) loves (love) Gene Autry. Christmas would not be same without him. Hopefully our marriage can survive this rift.

Don't Mess with Texas

Ah, the Texas Rangers.

 Yee-haw.

Just the name makes me think of this guy:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/4b/WalkerTitle.jpg

Didn't really care for the show, but then again, Chuck Norris doesn't really do it for me.

I actually have a few things to say about the Texas Rangers. Their story is interesting -- the original Washington Senators became the Twins, then MLB gave Washington a NEW Senators ballclub in 1961 and then after the 1971, THOSE Senators moved to Arlington to become the Rangers.

George W. Bush and a group of investors bought the team for $89 million in 1989. He was named Managing General Partner of the group, and apparently increased his investment over the first year. So, it seems like he didn't do too bad a job there.

Good for him. See, even though I'm a flaming liberal, I can give credit where credit is due! Although there was apparently some financial shadiness and murky allegations of insider trading and oil money and personal profit from the expenditure of public funds...but you can read about that here. Wikipedia did note:

As President, Bush has refused to authorize the SEC to release its full report on the Harken investigation.When the Rangers franchise was sold for $250 million in 1998, at a total profit of $170 million, Bush personally received $14.9 million for his $600,000 investment.

Wait, the Bush Administration wasn't forthcoming with documents that are relevant to the public and would perhaps expose unsavory dealings by him or his political cronies? Oh hush, that's just crazy talk. 

Oops -- this is a BASEBALL post, stay on point.

After his time with the Rangers, like the proverbial butterfly-wing-flap that sets off a hurricane on the other side of the globe, he was elected Governor of Texas...and the entire course of world history was inexorably altered. 

I'll just put it this way - I wish Dubya would have stuck with baseball. Go Rangers!

The Marlins/Marlons

Because a ski vacation awaits, I'm going to have to make this a quick one. The fact that it's going to be 60 today does not dampen my enthusiasm for some adult time with out-of-town friends! I will ski on slush to get out of the house and socialize with a glass of wine -- literally.

http://mlb.mlb.com/team/  

I'm going to go with the Marlins. Wikipedia has a section in their Marlin entry entitled "Birth of the Marlins," but to be more precise, I think it should say "Hatching of the Marlins."

Marlons that I think are more interesting than the Marlins:

Marlon Brando. The greatest movie actor of all time? Perhaps.

Marlon Jackson. He was born several weeks premature, and had a twin brother who died shortly after birth. Also, he is/was a successful real estate agent in Southern California. I knew none of this prior to today.





Marlon Wayans. He attended the LaGuardia High School of the Performing Arts (the school from Fame) and Howard University.

Yeah, that's all I've got. Did I miss anyone?

Houston, we have a problem...

...which is that I have very little to say about you, today, or any other day.

Today I'm writing about the Houston Astros. These guys.

http://images.pictureshunt.com/pics/a/astros_logo-9414.gif

Apparently, they used to be these guys:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/c/ce/HOU_1094.gif/220px-HOU_1094.gif

but that was a really long time ago (1964)...but I suppose they do count as another team who sanitized their former name that had violent connotations. Guess there's a lot of those!

Anyway, their new name is supposed to reflect NASA and the space program, located nearby at the Johnson Space Center. If I were to find myself in Houston, I would be more inclined to visit Space Center Houston, the visitor's center at Johnson, than go to an Astros game. Truth be told.

I know that MLB would prefer that when I think of the Astros, I think of this:

http://www.baseballpilgrimages.com/national/minutemaid.jpg

or this:

http://www.nasa.gov/images/content/296657main_jsc2008e154358.jpg 

But in reality, I think of this:

http://tralfaz.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/astro.jpg

Chicago Cubs and a few good book/movie selections

I like Chicago quite a bit - in fact, if I were to move back to the Midwest I would very strongly consider it. It reminds me of Pittsburgh, only bigger; New York, but smaller and with a less offensive-to-the-ears hometown accent; St. Paul, but dirtier; Boston, but newer; Milwaukee ["Actually, it's pronounced "mill-e-wah-que" which is Algonquin for "the good land."] but tougher. A number of our friends in NY moved to Chicago to the point that our daughter thought that's what people did -- moved to Chicago -- when their oldest kid turned 5.

One of their two MLB teams is the Cubs (but c'mon, you already knew that):

http://mlb.mlb.com/team/

But so many other great things are set in this city! Besides the Chicago Manual of Style (which I adore), in real life there's fantastic shopping, an amazing food scene, Navy Pier, the Art Institute of Chicago, Wait! Wait! Don't Tell Me! and This American Life...so much to do that a three-day weekend would challenge you to pick only your absolute favorites.

HOWEVER... Chicago is the setting for a substantial amount of literary and theatrical fabulousness, as well.

Two books that I absolutely LOVE that are set in Chicago: Devil in the White City, by Erik Larson, and the Dresden Files series, by Jim Butcher. Devil in the White City is a fantastic non-fiction story set at the 1893 Chicago World's Fair, about the fair itself and a serial killer. SO GOOD. The Dresden Files books are about a wizard who lives in Chicago...and it's excellent if you like that kind of thing. And even if you don't, you might not hate it.

There are many other great works of literature set in Chicago, such as Native Son, but I have to admit that after reading that for AP English in 12th grade I haven't opened it again, because it is so damn depressing. Just the word "Bigger" makes my stomach churn.

Lots of great plays/musicals are set in Chicago too... Glengarry Glen Ross, Proof, A Raisin in the Sun, Superior Donuts (which I did not see on Broadway but oh how I wanted to)...and of course, the eponymous Chicago. (Wow, I think that's the first time I've gotten to use the word "eponymous" in a sentence.)

As for movies, well...that list is long and (somewhat) distinguished, films that were at least partially set in Chicago or Chicagoland:

The good:

• About Last Night... 
• Home Alone
• Mean Girls
• Meet the Parents (I'm not even going to deign to mention the other two)
• Bridesmaids
• Adventures in Babysitting (Elizabeth Shue circa 1987 - everybody loved her)
• Wayne's World (contains a line I have found myself quoting unironically all the time -- Stacy:  Well, that doesn't mean we can't still go out. Wayne-Well, actually it does. That's what breaking up is. )
• National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
• My Best Friend's Wedding
• High Fidelity (the book was better, but oh well)

The great:

• When Harry Met Sally (more of a NY movie, to be sure, but it did start off here)
• National Lampoon's Vacation
• Risky Business (oh, you were so cool before you got all weird, Tom)
• Ordinary People
• THE ENTIRE JOHN HUGHES HIGH SCHOOL CANON. ALL OF IT.
• My Big Fat Greek Wedding
• Ferris Bueller's Day Off 
• The Blues Brothers
• Sleepless in Seattle
• The Sting
• Glengarry Glen Ross (before Jack Donaghy was Jack Donaghy, he was Blake)

The terrible:

• The Whole Nine Yards
• Home Alone 2
• Home Alone 3 (and I think there's a "4" but I choose not to actually find out)
• What Women Want (anti-Semites plus tired stereotypes = no thank you)
• Vegas Vacation (enough already)
• Michael (John Travolta as an angel. Gag. The wings looked cool, though.)
• Curly Sue (I usually think it's a terrible thing to hate a child, but...)

The probably-objectively-terrible-and-I-recognize-this-but-I-still-like-watching-it: 

• Wildcats
• Backdraft 
• While You Were Sleeping (an integral component of the Bill Pullman/Bill Paxton test)
• National Lampoon's European Vacation
• Never Been Kissed
• She's Having a Baby  (the "baby" in this movie would now be 24. Frightening.)
• The Lake House
• Dick Tracy
• Flatliners (so many good people in this completely average one!)
• Save the Last Dance (I do love this movie. It is so completely unrealistic, and not nearly as good as Center Stage, and Julia Stiles cannot do hip-hop, but I do love it.

My only complaint about Chicago is that I really don't care for deep-dish pizza. Too greasy and doughy for me. Other than that, go Cubs!

[shudder]

Oh we've got trouble...right here in Tampa Bay*

My team of the day is the Tampa Bay Rays. This is another team that I (surprise!) know nothing about, so I turned to Wikipedia. And, I challenged myself to find some link to making me care about this team, by way of musical theater.

http://mlb.mlb.com/team/

Let's start with fun facts about the Rays - They were called the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, but a la the Washington Bullets their name was sanitized so that the team would become "a beacon that radiates throughout Tampa Bay and across the entire state of Florida."

Lame.

*Tampa Bay is not a municipality, merely a body of water. I consider this to be misleading. 

They play in Tropicana Stadium, and I like orange juice, so I guess that's okay.

But now I will attempt to connect the Tampa Bay Rays to me in some meaningful way....watch this:

Tampa Bay → The line from "Wells Fargo Wagon" (The Music Man): And once I got some grapefruit from Tampa..." → Shirley Jones was in The Music Man → Shirley Jones was from Charleroi, and was crowned "Miss Pittsburgh" in 1952→ I'm from Pittsburgh.

See? That one was kind of easy.

Alternative route:

Tampa Bay → The line from "Wells Fargo Wagon" (The Music Man): "And once I got some grapefruit from Tampa..." → Shirley Jones was in The Music Man with Robert Preston → Robert Preston was in the movie "The Last Starfighter", with which I was obsessed when I was in 5th and 6th grades (until Top Gun came out, and then Dirty Dancing) → In 2004 someone had the genius idea of making "The Last Starfighter" into an off-Broadway musical → I love musicals.

Ok, one more:

Tampa Bay  →  The line from "Wells Fargo Wagon" (The Music Man): "And once I got some grapefruit from Tampa..."  →  Shirley Jones was in The Music Man with Robert Preston  →  The song "Ya Got Trouble" from The Music Man includes the line ""ow they're gonna cover up a tell-tale breath with Sen-Sen."  →  Billy Joel also mentioned Sen-Sen in "Keeping the Faith" ["I took a fresh pack of Luckies and a mint called Sen-Sen"]  →  "Keeping the Faith" was on Joel's 1983 album "An Innocent Man"  →  Also on "An Innocent Man" was "This Night," where the chorus melody is taken directly from Beethoven's Sonata Pathetique →  I heard Sonata Pathetique the other day on those cable music channels in the 500s that I leave on so there's background for the baby and while on the "Light Classical" channel I found myself singing "This night will last for-eeeee-ver....Why is Billy Joel in my head?"  → I need to get out of the house more.

And....done.

San Diego Padres...sure, why not.

So I'm going to blog about the San Diego Padres tonight. And it's going to be quick - I'm going to bust this out in 5 minutes or less....okay, GO:

http://mlb.mlb.com/team/

Funny story about that - My husband and I are watching the entire first season of Homeland this week, and we're in the middle of the finale. I said, I have to blog for the baseball challenge tonight, so give me a few minutes...what team do I not care about or know anything about, at all? My husband said, the Padres.

Good call.

Here it is: I have never been to San Diego, but everyone I know who has, loves it. Apparently, there is a hotel in San Diego (or near it, I'm in too much of a hurry to fully fact-check) called the Hotel del Coronado. It's beautiful. Here it is:

https://encrypted-tbn2.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTcXgzOqmy-0eOPgKOvDFCg-2aHeCEE_SlZhTC8zFf2qQ5RZ-ey

We took our daughter to Disney World this past May. I call her Cinderella, because deep in her heart of hearts, I think that's who she truly believes she is. She wore her Cinderella wedding dress around the park in 95 degree heat (the thing is polyester and tulle and long-sleeved and covered in glitter, that kid really COMMITS), she wore it for Halloween, and she wears it around the house at least three times a week - she wore it today, in fact. It's getting a bit shabby, but it's still pretty fancy. She comes home from school and changes into it more often than not.

Anyway, we decided to really "do up" Disney because I was almost 5 months pregnant at the time, and we knew this would be the last visit for at least a few years, because I am a big fan of self-preservation and not putting myself in situations that lead to bad parenting or heavy drinking, or both. Taking a baby to Disney World qualifies. We stayed in the fanciest hotel at the park, the Grand Floridian.

It looks like this:

https://encrypted-tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQJwvFauRl_cTAvyqQs9JlbBs-eCTPJhxClUmZ_jZ4pVsBLcMH_

No points for originality, Walt.

So, um, yeah. That's it. That's my blog post about San Diego. Now I have to go watch Claire Danes and Mandy Patinkin (I'm so impressed he didn't manage to work in a ballad or two, that shows real restraint on his part) in one of best new shows I've seen in a while. Not "Wire"-level amazing or anything, but I'm saving those musings for my post about the Orioles.

Rocky Mountain High -- a Travelogue

Who DOESN'T like to start their day off with a little John Denver? (Don't answer that.)

My team of the day is the Colorado Rockies. As such:

http://mlb.mlb.com/team/

I'm not an expert on this team, but I do wonder: Does it date me that I still consider them an expansion team? (Again, don't answer that.)

It's becoming apparent that my knowledge of major league baseball is frozen somewhere around 1993 or thereabouts. 

ANYWAY....the Rockies. Colorado. Been there once, loved it to pieces.

The summer before I started law school, my best friend from college and I decided to take a road trip. We had four goals -- 

1. Be in Denver to see Blues Traveler at Red Rocks on July 3rd 
2. Be at the Grand Canyon by July 11th (or thereabouts) for our campsite reservation at the North Rim
3. Find me an apartment in Minneapolis 
4. Get me on my plane back to Pittsburgh on July 21. 

I moved out of my apartment in DC, and flew to Madison (with ungodly amounts of stuff, including one giant hardsided suitcase, a giant duffle bag [hockey-sized], two carry-ons, a backpack, a purse, and a guitar. The guitar is pink.) These were the days when airline staff could take pity on a traveler, and they did -- they only charged me $50 total for extra luggage. Considering each bag weighed at least 60 lbs., that was pretty nice of them. I may have cried a little.

So I arrived in Madison, and we loaded up her Ford Explorer and, after a stop for provisions at the Kraft Foods Company Store (her dad worked for Oscar Mayer) we took off. That truck was FULL of our luggage, and we added to that a tent, sleeping bags, ground cover, beef jerky, Lunchables (TM), packs of bologna and cheese slices, cases of beer and Diet Coke, grapes, cans of Pringles (TM) and other "convenience foods", and -- I'm ashamed to admit this but about 6 cartons of Marlboro Ultra Lights (Did you know that Phillip Morris owns Kraft? Purchased on-site with the employee discount, those were the cheapest smokes EVER.)

We drove through Illinois, stopping at Ronald Reagan's birthplace to take pictures (I think I was a Republican then), and on through Iowa on Interstate 80. Dodged a tornado somewhere near Ames and made it to Omaha in time to hit the Cracker Barrel for some chicken-fried steak. We drove on to Denver the next day, where we were told that John Popper had some sort of health problem (not really a surprise, right?) and that, as a result, the concert was cancelled. So we enjoyed the many delights of the city of Denver (about which there are stories that I really should NOT put on the Internet, even if very few people read this) and drove on to Pike's Peak. We drove up to the top, I was white-knuckled the whole time, and at the summit we each had a cigarette and threw up. Sarah also almost passed out -- altitude...who knew? Not us, apparently.

We made our way across Colorado for the next week or so, going white-water rafting in the Arkansas River through the Royal Gorge, riding horses in the San Juan mountains, stopping at every single Dairy Queen we saw (I can spot them from miles away - it's a gift), gambling at the Ute casino (I won $150 on quarter slots!) and alternating between camping and staying in cheap hotel rooms. It. Was. Awesome. Driving through the mountains, narrow and twisty and climby, became second nature, and it was some of the most amazing natural beauty I had ever experienced. Jagged peaks, tall pine forests that stretched on forever, the smell of super clean air, and charming little towns like Silverton and Ouray made me want to stop the car and never leave. And did I mention I purchased some fabulous cowboy boots?

After successfully avoiding contracting hanta virus at Four Corners, we finally arrived at the Grand Canyon and our campsite, where I got to sit in front of a campfire and play Indigo Girls songs on my pink guitar in my brand-new hat and boots (c'mon, don't you want to be my friend? I sound super-fun, right?), and we hiked down into the canyon the next day. On our way back up, an 80 year man passed us by at a good clip, so in our non-athletic despair we ate a can of Cheez Balls (TM) and then started the trek back. We made it back to Cortez that night, and then from there to Ogalalla and arrived in Burnsville, MN. At that point, driving for 7 hours without stopping, and then trading places and going for another 7, was nothing. We also stopped speaking to each other in Ogalalla, so that was kinda awkward...

But we found me an apartment and started speaking again, and I made it back home -- in time to wash my clothes and dust off my guitar and put it all in a moving truck and drive it on out to my new apartment in Uptown.

So when I think of the Rockies, THAT'S what I think of -- the piney mountains, a loaded-down car, lots of cans of Cheez Balls, and a time in my life when all I really had to do for three weeks was get to a concert on time and enjoy the rest of the (very long) ride.

Poor Sacramento.

So my team of the day is the Oakland Athletics.

http://mlb.mlb.com/team/

I picked them because I don't really have time today to write the kind of bloggy ode to teams like the Twins, Brewers, or Pirates, for whom I have strong happy feelings and want to wax profound about for lines and lines.

It turns out I know surprisingly little about this team, and everything I do know I learned from watching Moneyball a few weekends ago. Given that, I won't say much about them, and will focus more on the fact that they are one of five baseball teams in the great state of California.

Five?! That's a lot.

Granted, California is huge. It would have the 8th largest GDP in the world if it were its own country (but would probably slide to #15 if George Lucas, Ron Howard, Steven Spielberg, and Jerry Bruckheimer all moved to Atlanta to live in Tyler Perry's neighborhood). The size of its population is comparable to Poland. As of 2006, it has the largest minority population in the country. I get it -- it's gigantic and diverse and important by most measures.

But that's still a lot of baseball teams. And I question their choices; Frankly, I think it's rude that Sacramento, the state capital, does NOT have a major league baseball franchise but Oakland, 12.3 miles from San Francisco and the Giants, does.

If I were Sacramento, I'd be kind of pi$$ed about that.

Cleveland Rocks

Does it? Well, if Drew Carey says so...it must be true.

http://mlb.mlb.com/team/

I don't actually know that much about Cleveland - I've driven past it more times than I can count, especially on my way to the best amusement park in the world, Cedar Point. The "amazement park by the lake," if I recall their commercials correctly.

I do have some love for Cleveland in the sibling rivalry sort of way. You see, when you're from Pittsburgh, you hate Cleveland because you hate the Browns. But, if anyone else trashes the Browns -- well now, step off, that's MY job.

Wikipedia describes it thus:

The rivalry took a brief hiatus from 1996-1998 due to the Cleveland Browns relocation controversy. When the league was voting on the Browns relocation, Steelers owner Dan Rooney was one of only two owners to vote against the move. In tribute of Cleveland losing the Browns, Steeler fans wore orange arm bands to the final game at Three Rivers Stadium as a sign of mutual respect and sorrow for losing a great rivalry. While Browns fans still consider the Steelers as their main archrival, a small number of Steeler fans consider their rivalry with the Baltimore Ravens the spiritual successor to this rivalry due to Art Modell moving the his franchise to Baltimore and establish the expansion Ravens, even though the recent one-sidedness of this rivalry in favor of the Steelers has influenced this thinking as well. Nevertheless, it is still heated between both teams and one of the most heated rivalries in the NFL.

Ok, I know...that's FOOTBALL, this is a BASEBALL blogging challenge. But considering the source -- that the author of this blog would not by any measure be considered a sports fan although she does love certain football and baseball teams -- the fact that I have some independent knowledge of any sports-type information is really impressive.  And only some of it comes from reading Bill Simmons.

But enough about that -- Cedar Point is fabulous. You should absolutely go there.

Their roller coasters are RIDICULOUS. They are super-high, super-fast, super-twisty, and they're always building new ones that are higher, faster, and twistier than the rest. I used to go there every summer when I was a kid. Bless my father's heart, he used to drive me and my neighbor friend the four hours to the park, ride all day, and then drive home late that night. Amy and I would play War in the backseat until I felt carsick, and then we'd sleep. I went in high school, too, and that was fun, although I spent too much time putting on lip gloss and rolling my jean shorts to really have as much fun as I did when I was little.

I went in college, too, with one of my best friends, and we went on the Raptor, a roller coaster that's connected at the top (your legs dangle down). Right before it was ready to launch, I realized that my super-cute outfit that I had spent at least 20 minutes picking out (white baby doll t, white cotton miniskirt with lemons on it, and white no-back slip-on tennis shoes with a chunky lug heel -- it was 1996) was not the best choice for this ride, as those super fabulous shoes were about to dangle right off my feet and onto the ground 60 feet below. So Beth grabbed them off my feet and shoved them in her pockets.

She was such a good friend. And those shoes were totally hot, in that 1996 kind of way.

http://www.harbors-edge.com/attractions.aspx

Geaux Tigers

So today's blog post focuses on the Detroit Tigers. Yes, I know that spelling refers to LSU, so you don't need to correct me, but a) I like to type fancy words on my fancy new iPad keyboard that attaches to my case and b) Detroit (de-TWA) sounds Franche, too...

 Anyway, the only things I really have to say about the Detroit Tigers are:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Detroit_Tigers_logo.svg

1. I've been to Detroit. I dated a guy in high school, VERY BRIEFLY, who lived outside of Detroit in one of the nicer suburbs (something like Farmington? Farmington Hills? Is that a place?). I went there to visit him, then I quickly turned around and went back to Pittsburgh and decided that was enough of that. (Huh. In remembering that story, it suddenly occurs to me that my parents were kind of weirdly permissive about certain things.)
2. That's a cool logo. It's old school. None of this au courant crap with team names like the Diamond Rays and logos with neon colors and glitter bombs. It looks like someone typed it on the front page of the New York Times, and that's all right by me.
3. Whenever I see a Detroit Tigers hat I think of Magnum, P.I. He really wore it well. And that might be the only mustache that I've ever thought looked right on a man.

http://thatcostumegirl.com/2010/06/04/magnum-pi-force

I'm sure you agree.

The Mets...and other NY stuff

Well, it's just under the wire, so I'd better make this quick. Day one of the #springtrainingblogchallenge. I'm in New York, so let's make it about the Mets, shall we? 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:New_York_Mets.svg

It's my first trip back to New York post-baby. I am kid-free for two and half days and two nights, going to work during the day and spending the evenings with my best friend from law school in her fabulous UWS apartment. There have been some hiccups - such as the fact that my i.d. badge was turned off and I couldn't get into the building, someone stole my mouse and powercord for my docking station, and my passwords were so f*$%ed up and my computer was so behind on updates that I wasn't able to actually log in until 4 pm. 


BUT...there have been a lot of positives. Such as, being with my dear friend in a kid- and spouse-free way for the first time in many years... satisfying my cravings for Indian and Thai food...seeing the Chrysler building up close and personal again...wine(s) with dinner...seeing another dear friend's week old baby girl and holding her for a good long time...using my Duane Reade loyalty card again to spend $45 on $30 worth of merchandise...having $5 on an old Metrocard that would have expired at the end of March and using it to get to and from work...and not feeling guilty about being away, knowing that the girls are in the ever-capable hands of both the nanny and my husband.


And I did see Citifield on the Amtrak train on Sunday, so I guess there's my real connection to MLB. Sadly, in our 4+ years of living here, I never made it to an actual game. Or a Yankees game, which I probably would have preferred. I still hate the Mets for stealing away Barry Bonds and Bobby Bonilla. Yeah, I can really hold a grudge.

Blogging Challenge

Ok, ProntoPup, I'm in. I get extra credit for having to blog from my laggy phone while traveling for work.

30 days of blogging, on subjects that have even the most tenuous connection to major league baseball. This will be Day One, post to follow.